Suyuan
by FaustinaAurelia13
Summary: A journey to find freedom and to escape the past that threatens to destroy her. The past of Amaterasu. Sidefic to Last Time of My Life.
1. Heaven Illuminated

Author's Note:

Wow I wrote a Peacemaker Kurogane story (never thought that would happen). My deepest thanks go to Sakura02 who first accepted the character of Amaterasu for her story Last Time of My Life, which led to me being smacked by the frying pan of inspiration (which certain authors on this site are familiar with) and thus Suyuan was born. Chapter title is courtesy of cjmarie, who is one of my favorite GW authors.

Disclaimers:

I don't own Peacemaker Kurogane or any of its characters. I do, however, own Amaterasu, her father and mother, and any other characters I may come up with. Sentences with an * were borrowed with permission (see following sentence) from Sakura02's story Last Time of My Life to help tie the two stories together. I, Sakura02, hereby grant permission to author Hellfire13 to use and recreate any certain amount of sentences from my story Last Time of My Life for the general purpose of reference and closure for her new story. I hope you enjoy the story, comments and criticisms are accepted.

Her first thought was to find Okita in Edo, so she trekked in the general direction she thought was south, unaware that her friend had already left the Shieikan to live out his days serving under Kondo in the city of Kyoto*. After four long years of searching, Amaterasu had finally located her childhood friend Soji. She had journeyed over much of the central island of Japan, barely resting or eating in order to put as much distance between her and her father as she could. She had asked about Soji in every village she had stopped in and finally received news about him in a small village in northern Kyoto. According to the village shaman, Soji had helped to form the Shinsengumi, a special military police force, and was serving under a man named Kondo. The shaman gave her detailed directions, frowning slightly at the noticeable bruises that covered most of the exposed skin and the severe limp as she walked away.

*Mibu, Kyoto*

A group of Shinsengumi officers were returning from patrol only to discover a body collapsed in front of the main gate of the Shinsengumi compound. Not knowing what else to do, one of the soldiers picked her up and carried her into the compound only to see Soji crouching on the ground teasing Saizo with a piece of food. Hearing the footsteps of the approaching officers, he glanced in the direction of the noise and frowned at the limp form in one of the officer's arms.

"Who do we have here?" Soji inquired as he stood up and walked over to the officer.

"I don't know, sir" the officer replied "we found her unconscious in front of the main gate".

"A woman?" Soji wondered as he looked her over. The first thing he noticed was the thread-bare clothing and the sword clutched tightly in her hands. There were visible cuts and bruises on both arms and legs. She whimpered as he ran his fingers over her left wrist which was completely red and bruised and he could feel a bone that was sticking out of place. He became aware of a strange smell coming from below him and looked down to see blood dripping from a roughly made bandage on her right foot.

Wondering who the woman was, Soji reached forward and brushed a strand of limp black hair away from her face. He gazed down in shock at a familiar face that he had not seen in seventeen years.

"Amaterasu".

Well that is chapter one, I apologize for the shortness. I look forward to your positive and negative reviews. The negative ones might make me cry though. I will make chapter two longer or I will die trying. Please review, it makes me happy.

Hellfire


	2. Akycha

Author's Note:

Chapter two has been completed. I would like to thank Sakura02 and Bunches for leaving wonderful reviews that made me smile, cookies and hugs and flowers for them. I dedicate this chapter to my African violets-may they grow, flower, and bring me happiness and to cjmarie, I wish you joy and happiness and that your cactus continues to thrive. I hope my efforts have pleased all those who read this.

Disclaimers:

I don't own Peacemaker Kurogane or any of its characters. I do, however, own Amaterasu, her father and mother, and any other characters I may come up with. Comments of the positive and negative are accepted and greatly desired.

SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Soji sat beside the unconscious Amaterasu, slowly stroking his thumb along her undamaged right hand which was held loosely by both of his hands. Matsumoto had examined her, treated and bandaged her wounds, and cleaned her up. She wore a sapphire blue kimono and her damp hair was pulled back in a loose braid. Her left arm was in a sling and her right foot had a fresh bandage with a poultice of herbs on the wound.

"What happened to you" Soji spoke into the silence. He had begun to witness her father's bizarre behavior after her mother's death, but had just assumed it was due to his grief. He fought to control the anger that welled up inside him from the severity of the numerous wounds that had been inflicted upon Amaterasu's body. He could only imagine what sort of psychological scars her father had inflicted on her as well. His thoughts were interrupted by Tetsu who told him that Hijikata wanted to speak to him about Amaterasu. As he exited the room and shut the door, Amaterasu's eyes slowly opened.

SSSSSSSSSSSSS

Soji walked along the exterior walkway of the Shinsengumi headquarters, careful to stay under the awning that covered it to avoid the pouring rain. He had searched most of the compound and was now heading to an empty storage building. The conversation between himself, Hijikata, and Matsumoto replaying itself over and over in his mind.

"_Her ankle will never fully heal" Matsumoto said grimly "but with proper care she may be able to walk, though she shouldn't put any weight on that ankle"._

_Hijikata frowned "What happened to her?"_

"_It was her father who did that to her" Soji said solemnly, noting the shocked looks on both Hijikata's and Matsumoto's faces "right before I left I noticed that she had bruises on her arm, but I didn't think it was anything serious. I think the death of her mother affected him which caused him to blame and hate Amaterasu and he took those feelings out on her physically" Soji explained sadly. _

"_Does that mean her father might be looking for her" Matsumoto asked concerned. _

"_I don't know" Soji said honestly "but for running away, he just might kill her". _

"_Then it's settled" Hijikata said firmly "she will live here"._

SSSSSSSSSSSS

As Soji was just about to enter the storage building, he heard a faint noise coming from behind the building. He stepped off of the walkway and gazed shocked into the dark space between the building and the wall that circled the compound. Amaterasu lay curled in a ball, soaking wet with a stray kitten licking her face and meowing. He reached into the space and gently pulled Amaterasu into his arms.

"Oh Ame-chan" he whispered quietly as he brushed hair out of her face. He noticed that her face seemed flushed, so he gently pressed the back of his hand to her forehead only to pull it back just as fast. She was burning up with fever, yet at the same time was shivering as though it was the dead of winter. While he held her, she had unconsciously curled her body towards his in an attempt to find warmth. As he moved his arm under her legs to pick her up, she moaned painfully and he looked down to see that the bandages on her ankle were soaked in blood. He slowly stood up and carried her back to the compound with the kitten trailing behind, failing to notice a puddle near where her face had lain that was tinged with the faintest trace of red.

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The end of chapter two is here at last. Chapter three is in progress and will be posted as soon as it is finished (which may be a while). Please review, I'll be more depressed if you don't .


	3. Wasterzhi

Author's Note: Chapter three already, fast wasn't it. I hope this story is as good as Last Time of My Life. I am really trying to make this story as best as I possibly can, but how am I supposed to know if anyone besides Sakura02 really likes this story. Darn you Sakura02 and your blackmail, are you going to blackmail me with the rest of your story. I dedicate this chapter to Sakura02 whose support keeps me going throughout the hardest times of writing Suyuan. Without further ado, here is chapter three.

Disclaimers:

I don't own Peacemaker Kurogane or any of its characters. I do, however, own Amaterasu, her father and mother, and any other characters I may come up with. Comments of the positive and negative variety are accepted and needed to better the story to live up to your expectations.

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_She woke to intense pain, which was nothing new to her considering what her father subjected to daily. She heard footsteps outside the door causing panic and fear to take hold of her. Once the sound of footsteps faded into the distance, she looked around at the room she was in. The room was totally unfamiliar to her and that frightened her. She could not even begin to guess what her father had in store for her this time. The familiar weight of the manacle around her ankle was strangely absent and hearing no sounds from outside the room she fled, the pain in her ankle like a knife being pushed deeper with each step._

_She quietly shut the door and took a few steps forward before tumbling off of the raised deck and falling to the muddy ground. The impact jarred her left wrist causing her to gasp in pain. She lay there letting the rain soak through to her skin, silently hoping that no one had heard her. After a few minutes of silence and no evidence of approaching noise, she slowly got to her feet and limped away from the building. _

_As she walked, she felt both hot and cold at the same time. Things blurred in front of her eyes causing her to collapse against a building. She managed to crawl into the space behind the building before she fell prey to a severe coughing fit. Her chest burned and ached after she had stopped coughing and looked down in horror to see little droplets of red staining the pale skin of her palm. Blood pounded in her ears and black crept into the edges of her vision as she fell into the darkness of unconsciousness. _

_She returned to consciousness to hear an animal near her and feel it licking her face. She couldn't summon the strength to open her eyes when she felt herself being moved and a sensation of warmth that hadn't been there before. She curled her body towards the warmth hoping it would lessen the cold that ran through her body and soul. A familiar voice calmed the panic that rose up inside her and she surrendered herself to the darkness for a second time. _

SSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Soji once again sat by Amaterasu's side, this time not leaving until she woke. He could understand how she felt, being alone in a strange new place after years of torment. The kitten hadn't left her side either and was now joined by two others. All of the kittens were leopard cats, a rarity in this part of Japan. The kittens were resting in various places around her body, with one in the open palm or her right hand. Soji wiped her forehead with a cool damp cloth and prayed that her fever would go down. Matsumoto was trying to determine what caused both the chills and fever, but was so far unsuccessful. One of the kittens meowed causing him to look down into sapphire eyes full of confusion and fear.

"Where am I" she asked softly staring past Soji to the ceiling. The kitten that was on her hand had woken up and was now curled up on her stomach, its brown eyes staring back at her. She reached her unbandaged hand up to scratch the kitten's head.

"You're safe" Soji replied placing his hand over hers, causing the kitten to meow in protest to the pressure on its head. "You're at Shinsengumi headquarters".

"I looked all over for you" Amaterasu said on the brink of tears "for four years I was so lost and now I've finally found you. I've been running for so long and I don't think I know how to stop".

Soji felt both sadness and confusion at the same time "You spent four years searching for me. Why?"

"Because I feel safe with you" she said firmly, not willing or wanting to elaborate further.

"Amaterasu" Soji implored "please tell me what happened. If you try to trap your past inside you, it will destroy you".

"Just hold me" she whispered as she struggled to sit up and Soji pulled Amaterasu into his lap. The kittens crawled up on her legs and settled crawled up on her legs and settled on top of the blanket Soji had pulled over her lower half. She exhaled a deep breath before beginning to speak.

'After you left, my father began forcing me to learn swordsmanship. I was grateful because I knew that you were also training, but…" she trailed off as the memories that she had buried deep within her mind began to resurface. Soji gave her a small hug, silently reassuring her before she continued. "He also made me learn military history and war tactics". She laid her head on Soji's shoulder, her had gripping his like a lifeline that kept her memories and emotions from consuming her.

"He made me train and study until my hands bled and I didn't have the strength to stand. The frequent times he drank himself into unconsciousness, I was able to sleep for a few hours and eat a little food. He would beat me with whatever he could get his hands on whenever he wanted to. He shouted at me all the time, he said that I was weak, that he was ashamed that I was his daughter, and that I killed my mother" she stopped speaking for a moment as tears flowed down her cheeks.

"When I was twelve, my father moved me into the basement and chained me as though I was an animal. He beat me more severely and more frequently, with no food or rest except for when he beat me until I was unconscious which happened most of the time. Each night I dreamed of freedom and of being with you Soji, my dearest and only friend. On night when my father had passed out from drinking too much I used a rock to break the manacle and escaped with my mother's sword, my most precious treasure". She buried her head in Soji's chest and wept, the tears washing away the pain that had been growing within her for seventeen years. Soji enveloped her in a hug, tears silently flowing from his eyes as well.

After a few minutes, Amaterasu slowly pulled away and looked into Soji's eyes. "I'm really sleepy Soji" she said and Soji noticed that she was struggling to keep her eyes open and he could fell the coldness of her body.

"It's alright, you rest now" he said as he laid her down on the futon after shooing the kittens off her lap. He pulled three additional blankets over the one that already covered Amaterasu's body. "I promise I'll be here when you wake up". She whispered her thanks before closing her eyes and falling into a deep sleep, the kittens taking various positions around her body as though they were saying they would protect Amaterasu too. Soji looked to his side and reached down to pick up her mother's sword and remove it from its scabbard.

He ran his fingers over the kanji etched into the metal on one side of the blade. "That which illuminates heaven" he said turning to smile down at the sleeping Amaterasu "just like you".

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That is chapter three, the longest chapter yet. I really hope everyone enjoyed it. Did anyone catch my cleverness with what is engraved on the sword. Anyone who does (without using the internet) will get a special reward. Don't you be saying anything Sakura02 because I know that you know. Chapter four is in progress, but I am running out of ideas. Suggestions are being taken on what should happen next. I tried to stick to the timeline of Amaterasu's past set forth in chapter four of Last Time of My Life, hope it worked out right. Sakura02, your story may have two more chapters than mine but I am on you like butter on noodles. I have my eyes on you and am catching up to you and intend to win the chapter posting race. I am aware that there is no race but the imagined competition should light a fire under both of our butts.

Random factoid: I also have four blankets on my bed. For some reason I am super cold all the time.

Please review, I want your feedback. There are smores being made right now for the reviewers, I know you want a smore.


	4. Aurora

Author's Note:

I think I'm going to use the F word. Four, as in chapter four. You thought I was going to say something else didn't you. I am posting this after having taken a nice long nap, not a whole week like Amaterasu, just a few hours. I hope you all enjoy chapter four. I am still accepting ideas for this story, so please offer up some suggestions. What do you think should happen next? Many thanks and a heaping plate of s'mores go to Sakura02 for the much desired review and to everyone who reads this story. This chapter is dedicated to my comfy bed, which may not be as comfy as others but suits me just fine. I also dedicate this chapter to my toad lily, which died from rust but lives on in my heart and in a picture on my cell phone. I miss you dear flower.

Disclaimers:

I don't own Peacemaker Kurogane or any of its characters. I do, however, own Amaterasu, her father and mother, and any other characters I may come up with. Comments of the positive and negative variety are like flowers in the garden of my mind.

SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Amaterasu slept for an entire week, her body's way of recuperating and healing itself. While she slept, a mysterious trunk was delivered to the Shinsengumi with a note indicating that it was meant for Amaterasu. Soji had the trunk moved to Amaterasu's room to be opened by her when she awoke.

Amaterasu awoke feeling strangely calm, something she hadn't felt in many years. It was like a huge weight had been lifted from her soul. She pushed herself up into a sitting position and saw Soji sitting against the wall, fast asleep. She tried to stand up but halfway through the attempt she toppled over and the sound startled Soji from his slumber.

"Are you alright?" he said as he rushed to her side and helped her to sit up.

"I'm fine" she responded "I just wanted to get some fresh air. How long was I asleep?"

"A week" Soji said as he helped Amaterasu stand up and made their way outside. She closed her eyes and enjoyed the warm breeze that blew over her face. "Do you feel any better?"

"I'm feeling much better" she said sighing "but I don't know what I'm going to do now." "I didn't think about where I was going to stay or what I was going to, all I could think about was finding you."

"You are going to live here" Soji spoke, while both watched cherry blossom petals fall through the air "Hijikata-san has already decreed it."

"Hijikata?" Amaterasu responded, confusion evident in the tone of her voice.

"One of the vice-commanders of the Shinsengumi" a voice spoke from beside them as both Amaterasu and Soji were startled and looked to see who the source of the voice was.

"Matsumoto-san what are you doing here?" Soji asked surprised, as Amaterasu backed up against him fearfully, panicked by the unfamiliar person.

"It's alright" Soji whispered in her ear as he wrapped his arms around her waist. "Matsumoto is the Shinsengumi's doctor. He won't hurt you."

"I came to make sure Amaterasu's wounds were healing properly and to change her bandages" Matsumoto said as she began to visibly relax. "I swear on my life that I would never do anything to harm you" he said holding out his hand as a sign of trust smiling as Amaterasu hesitantly placed her hand in his. "Everything will be alright now" he said as he picked her up and carried her to his clinic. Near the edge of the building a mysterious figure faded unnoticed into the shadows.

SSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Amaterasu sat on a blanket spread out on the floor, Matsumoto kneeling behind her with his medical supplies surrounding him, and Soji sitting near Amaterasu in case she needed him. Matsumoto gently removed the sling from her arm and examined her wrist. "I don't think you need the sling anymore" Matsumoto said happily as he wrapped a bandage around the lower portion of her left arm "but I would keep it bandaged for a while longer to help the bruising and swelling go down, and light activity only when you use your left arm." "I need to check your back now" He continued, leaving Soji confused as to what he was talking about.

Amaterasu reached up and pulled her hair to the side before slipping her kimono off and letting it pool around her waist to reveal old scars and fresh wounds crisscrossing her back. She quickly grabbed a shawl and covered the front of her body with it. She kept her eyes downcast, secretly ashamed of letting Soji see her like this. Soji felt sick as he realized what and who had caused the wounds, her father had whipped her. "Everything appears to be healing nicely, next I'd like to see your ankle" Matsumoto said as he rubbed a thin layer of salve over her back before allowing her to pull her kimono back up to cover herself.

Amaterasu spun herself around so she was facing Matsumoto. He began to remove the bandage on her ankle, noting the blood that stained the inner layers. Once he had completely removed the bandage Soji saw for the first time, the state of her ankle. A jagged line of scabbed flesh surrounded by redness and bruises marred the pale skin of her foot. Matsumoto pressed his fingers into the skin of her foot near the wound and drew his fingers down her foot "Can you feel anything?" he asked frowning as Amaterasu shook her head. "I'm afraid the numbness isn't subsiding, which means that she'll probably never feel sensations with that foot with the exception of pain." He spread salve on the wound before putting a fresh bandage on it "I'd recommend not putting too much pressure on the foot, keeping it elevated, and keep a cold compress on it." "Is there anything you would like to ask me or tell me?" Matsumoto asked Amaterasu meeting her eyes with his. She stared at him for a few minutes before looking down at the ground before shaking her head no. Matsumoto could tell she was hiding something, but knew that she most likely didn't want to say anything in front of Soji and would come and talk to him in her own time. Having finished his examination, Matsumoto watched as Soji carried Amaterasu out of the clinic.

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As Amaterasu opened the door to her room for Soji, she saw a mysterious trunk near the wall. Soji crossed the threshold and sat Amaterasu down on the futon. He left the door open to allow fresh air to circulate through the room. He grabbed one of the extra blankets and folded it before laying it beneath her right foot. She knew she had to tell Soji about the blood, she wanted to tell him but she just couldn't bring herself to do it. Instead she let her focus wander to the trunk by the wall. Something about it just drew her to it, as though it was calling her.

Soji noticed that she couldn't stop staring at the trunk and decided to ask her about it. "It's for you" he said which startled her, causing her to turn her head to look at him.

"It is" she said softly as Soji went over and picked up the trunk and carried it over to her. She saw the letter with her name written on it and read it. "It's from my uncle, I've only met him a couple of times when he came to see my mother, the letter says that she made arrangements with him to make sure that I received this" she passed the letter to Soji who skimmed it taking note of her uncle's name, Tsukuyomi-very appropriate considering what his niece was named.

She ran her fingers over the delicate scrollwork on the lid of the trunk before slowly opening it. The trunk was completely full of silk drawstring bags. She reached in and pulled out a pale violet bag, running her fingers over the fabric before opening the bag and emptying the contents into the palm of her hand. Three small crystals fell into her palm. Soji noticed that they were the same shade of purple as the bag, but with a white tinge in parts of the crystal.

"My mother's crystals" Amaterasu responded to the confused look on Soji's face "after she died, I looked for them but couldn't find them. I thought my father had gotten rid of them." "My mother and I come from a long line of crystal healers. We have the ability to attune the energy in crystals with a person's energy or chakra to improve the physical and mental health of a person."

"I'd heard rumors of crystal healers" Soji responded as Amaterasu put the crystals back in the pouch before continuing to look through the crystals in the trunk "but I didn't think they existed until I met you mother."

She pulled out a pale blue bag with a white drawstring and pulled out one of the crystals. She closed her hand around it before closing her eyes and holding the stone to her heart. A few seconds later she opened her eyes and handed the stone to Soji. He took it and looked closely at it noting the square shape and the alternating thin, wavy stripes of grayish blue and white. "Keep it close to your skin" Amaterasu said "see how it makes you feel."

"Alright" Soji responded, slightly suspicious of the stone he held in his hand. He looked up and saw Amaterasu staring sadly at the trunk. "What's wrong?" he asked, worry evident in his voice.

"Could I be alone for a little bit?" she asked softly, eyes cast downward at the bag of crystals in her hand. "I just…" she stopped speaking, words escaping her as thoughts of her mother rose unbidden in her mind.

Soji saw that her hands were slightly shaking and gently enclosed her hands with his. "I understand" he said calmly "take as much time as you need. I'll be nearby if you need me." He tilted her head up and kissed her forehead before getting up and leaving the room. He paused while opening the door and looked back to see Amaterasu with her head buried in her hands which rested on the trunk's lid. He could hear her sobbing and as he closed the door behind him he heard her whisper a single heart wrenching word.

"Mommy."

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Amaterasu sat up and wiped the tears from her eyes. She felt this dull ache in her lungs right before she started to cough. The pain was unbearable and all she could do was to curl up in a ball and pray that it would stop. What seemed like an eternity later, she finally stopped coughing and pulled her hand away from her mouth to see blood covering her entire palm and dripping onto the floor. She knew instantly what was happening to her and what she had to do, even though she dreaded the outcome. She stood up using the trunk to help her only to close her eyes against a wave of dizziness. She made her way to the door and poked her head out. Seeing that Soji wasn't in the vicinity, she left the room and made her way to the clinic retracing the route from memory.

Once she got to the clinic, she hesitated for a few minutes before opening the door. She opened the door to find a strange young man looking through medical texts. He looked up startled by Amaterasu's entrance.

"I'm sorry to bother you" she said softly "I'll come back later."

"I'm Matsumoto's assistant" he spoke quickly as he stood up to prevent her from leaving "I can help you if you need it. You can trust me."

Amaterasu stood there, her hand clutched tightly to her chest uneasy about trusting a stranger so easily. Realizing she desperately needed his help, she slowly lowered her arm and opened her hand to reveal the blood staining her hand and slowly closed the door with her other hand.

"Help Me."

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The end of chapter four has been reached. What do you think? How does chapter four make you feel? What particular emotions does this chapter make you feel? What are your thoughts on Amaterasu? I'm positively dying to know. I hope everyone is enjoying the story so far. I broke the two thousand word mark and four pages of length on this chapter, making it the longest yet. I would appreciate any ideas you have for this story. My poor grey blob (aka my tiny little mind) is running on empty and would appreciate some fuel. See you in chapter five. Y'all are great people.


	5. Arinna

Author's Note: My grey blob (aka brain) is too exhausted to think. Need fuel (aka reviews) to function. Please to enjoy. Also can anyone guess what the stone that Amaterasu gave to Soji in chapter four is. There could be a reward involved. I apologize for the delay, darn calculus among other things. To conclude, Yamazaki lives… at least until Last Time of My Life.

Disclaimers:

I don't own Peacemaker Kurogane or any of its characters. I do, however, own Amaterasu, her father and mother, and any other characters I may come up with. Comments of the positive and negative variety are like stars in the night sky.

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Three Months Later

"How could you let her agree to this?" Soji said angrily as he stormed down the raised deck "More importantly, why didn't anyone tell me?"

"Amaterasu made the decision on her own" Yamazaki replied firmly as he tried to keep up with Soji. "She's the one who's ill."

Those words stopped Soji dead in his tracks "What do you mean ill?" he asked confused.

"Three months ago, she was diagnosed with tuberculosis" Yamazaki said as Soji spun around to face him.

"Three months ago" Soji said confused "but she left to visit her mother's grave two months ago and she seemed fine."

"She wasn't visiting her mother's grave" Yamazaki confessed "she was at Matsumoto's clinic in Edo."

"What was she doing there?"Soji asked as he resumed his journey towards the building where Amaterasu lived in voluntary isolation.

"She was coughing up blood, which indicates that she is in the later stages of the disease. There is a high chance that it is terminal and there weren't sufficient supplies to treat her here" Yamazaki said, continuing to follow after Soji.

Soji rounded the corner and saw Amaterasu lying on the raised deck, her bare feet dangling over the edge, and her three cats (which had grown since he had last seen them) were playing in the grass together.

"All this arguing is giving me a headache" Amaterasu's voice startled both Soji and Yamazaki "plus you're freaking my cats out." Both men noticed that the cats had stopped playing with each other and were eyeing them warily.

"Ama-" Soji began before being silenced by Yamazaki. He glared at Yamazaki before turning back to Amaterasu.

"Are you feeling alright?" Yamazaki asked concerned. As he spoke the biggest of the cats stopped playing with the others and jumped up onto the raised deck and started licking Amaterasu's hand.

"I felt a little dizzy, but I feel better now" she replied as she lifted the cat onto her chest "but you were worried about me weren't you Hotaru."

"Hotaru" Soji asked, a puzzled expression on his face.

"This is Hotaru" Amaterasu said, stroking the head of the cat on her chest "and that's Ran and Satoshi" she continued pointing to the two cats on the grass. Soji wondered to himself how she could tell the difference between the three, they all looked the same to him.

Amaterasu sighed before speaking as she reached over her head and grabbed a stack of papers weighed down by a large piece of dark green crystal and handed it to Yamazaki who tucked the papers in his kimono "I finished that item Hijikata requested."

Ever since Hijikata had learned about Amaterasu's expert-level knowledge of military strategy, he had frequently asked her opinion on military matters and factored that into his decision (this sentence isn't good, I realize that, but this is the best I could come up with after hours of turmoil and I do mean hours).

Yamazaki turned to leave but Amaterasu spoke up and stopped him "No stay, we both have some explaining to do." Yamazaki nodded his head in agreement.

"I'm sorry I had to lie to you Soji" Amaterasu said as she sat up and leaned against the wall "but I panicked."

"You could have just told me that your tuberculosis had returned. Why did I have to hear it from Yamazaki thirty minutes ago?" Soji questioned.

Amaterasu bit her lip as a surprised look crossed Yamazaki's face "What do you mean returned?"

Soji gave Amaterasu a knowing look "Don't look at me like that" Amaterasu asked "I was going to tell him, I really was, but my first concern was making sure that nobody else got sick because of me. I don't want what happened to my moth… I don't want something like that to happen again."

Soji could see that Amaterasu was getting visibly upset and spoke up "I'll tell him, if it's too painful for you." He watched as she nodded slowly, clutching Hotaru tightly to her chest.

SSSSSSSSSSSSSS

"Amaterasu and I grew up together in the same village" Soji began "when she was four years old she became terribly ill. News spread quickly through the village that she had tuberculosis. I tried to visit her but wasn't allowed to see her for fear that I would catch the disease myself. Her mother spent a great 

deal of time and energy using her crystals to heal Amaterasu. Amaterasu eventually began to recover, but then her mother got sick and died a few days later. After that Amaterasu…" Soji was cut off.

"After my mother's death I stayed in my room for two weeks, then didn't talk for a whole month and never fully recovered mentally" Amaterasu interjected "that's what you were going to say." Neither Yamazaki nor Soji spoke. "So now you know that I had tuberculosis when I was little" the stress from remembering the illness and her mother's death evident in her voice "could you leave me alone for a while, I need to rest." She waited until both Soji and Yamazaki were far in the distance before lifting Hotaru off her lap and standing up. She slid the door open only to find her father's face staring back at her before something struck her forehead and she fell into darkness.

SSSSSSSSSSSSS

Well that's it, chapter five in its entirety. I supremely apologize for neglecting my loyal readers, but I had a terrible summer class to contend with. But I'm back now and I hope you all enjoy this chapter. I'm taking suggestions as to what Amaterasu's father is going to do to her. I'll get right to work on chapter six, interesting suggestions may be incorporated. Thanks to everyone who takes time out of their day to read my story and thanks to all the reviewers. Thanks a bunch and torrential rain showers for everyone. Go frolic in the rain.


	6. Shakuru

Author's Note: Since nobody even tried to guess the crystal, I'll just tell you. It's blue lace agate. Also all the crystal information is taken from various websites, with sometimes conflicting information, so I just used the website that had the info that suited my purposes. I tried to be as accurate as possible. Also Suyuan has reached its climax and is now travelling downwards to the conclusion. Sorry if that saddens you.

Disclaimers:

I don't own Peacemaker Kurogane or any of its characters. I do, however, own Amaterasu, her father and mother, and any other characters I may come up with. Comments of the positive and negative variety are like the naturally light/refreshing flavor of a baby tea leaf.

Just to put a date on this, it's like the end of February 1867 (only because it snows in February).

o o o

The snowstorm had come out of nowhere. It had raged on for hours before Soji decided to bring Amaterasu some blankets. He arrived at the building just as the storm eased to find the door open and Amaterasu nowhere to be found. Her cats were meowing furiously at something and he went over and found a rock on the raised deck that was stained with blood. He looked out into the distance and made out a barely visible trail of footprints leading away from the building. He dropped the blankets and ran to the clinic to tell Yamazaki what had happened, for some reason Amaterasu was more at ease around Yamazaki than the other more rambunctious members of the Shinsengumi. Grabbing their swords and some medical supplies, wasting no more time both went off to find Amaterasu.

o o o

She barely managed to force her eyes open. Despite feeling very tired, she also felt the strange sensation that she was floating. The sound of footsteps echoed around her and then she felt a dull sensation in her right hand, but for some reason she didn't care and let herself drift back into unconsciousness. The man lit more sticks of incense, bringing the total burning to thirteen, then left the room and shut the door behind him.

A few hours later, Soji and Yamazaki arrived at an abandoned building on the outskirts of the village.

"I figured someone would show up eventually, but I never expected you this soon" Amaterasu's father spoke as he came around the corner of the building into view. He glowered at them before taking a long drink from a sake bottle.

"What did you do with Amaterasu?" Soji demanded.

"Nothing that bastard witch didn't deserve" her father smirked as he responded.

"Yamazaki" Soji said abruptly "go find Amaterasu. I'll take care of him" he continued as he laid his hand on the hilt of his sword.

Yamazaki circled around the man, never taking his eyes off him, and entered the building. The first few rooms were empty, but then he noticed smoke drifting through a crack in the door in front of him. He shoved the door open only to be assaulted by a strong odor that he identified immediately…opium incense. A lot of opium incense. As the smoke drifted out of the room, he saw Amaterasu lying on the floor. He entered the room, the noise from the fight clearly audible (it sounded like Soji was winning), and rushed to Amaterasu. He started to lift her up, but he felt a slight resistance. He glanced over her body and his gaze froze on a sword that impaled her right hand.

He laid her back down and slowly pulled the sword out. She didn't even react, but that was to be expected since the opium had numbed her ability to feel pain. He tossed the sword aside and laid her hand on her stomach to minimize blood loss before carrying her outside. He arrived at the exterior raised deck to find her father laying face down in the snow, his own sword sticking straight out of his back.

"Is she alright?" Soji asked as he approached Yamazaki. Yamazaki didn't respond, instead stepping off the raised deck and laying Amaterasu down before grabbing a handful of snow and gently rubbing it her face.

"What are you doing?" Soji demanded rushing over to Amaterasu.

"There was opium incense burning in the room where she was kept" Yamazaki explained "the cold from the snow should help her become conscious."

As he said that, Amaterasu moaned and her eyelids fluttered open. She slowly rolled onto her side before throwing up the entire contents of her stomach, then proceeded to fall into a deep sleep.

"That's good" Yamazaki said relieved "hopefully this got some of the drugs out of her system." As he spoke he ripped a piece of fabric from the sleeve of Amaterasu's kimono and used it to bandage the wound in her hand. "He put a sword through her hand" Yamazaki said in response to Soji's questioning gaze.

Soji picked Amaterasu up "Don't tell her I killed her father, just tell her that he was dead when we got here." Yamazaki nodded his consent. They arrived back at Shinsengumi headquarters without anyone noticing they were gone.

o o o

Two days had passed and Amaterasu hadn't left her room. She barely ate anything, never slept, and didn't speak to anyone or allow anyone to see her. Soji had had just about enough of her self-imposed exile, which is why he was going to see her. He slowly opened the door and saw Amaterasu staring into a small fire, holding a piece of green crystal in her right hand. He entered the room and sat a tray bearing a single cup on the floor.

"He's still here" she spoke out of the blue "every time I close my eyes I can still see him, still hear him yelling at me. He's even in my dreams and I can't make him go away."

Soji laid his hand over her right hand and opened it to reveal the crystal "What's this?" he asked distracting Amaterasu from her thoughts.

"It's alexandrite to help my hand heal" she replied. She shifted the crystal to her other hand, revealing the wound. It had almost completely healed, but would leave a scar. Soji felt her hands shaking beneath his. Yamazaki had told him that she might suffer withdrawal symptoms for a while.

"I'm fine" Amaterasu said bluntly cutting off what Soji was about to say "I don't need Yamazaki's help."

"Drink this" Soji said as he handed Amaterasu the cup, keeping one hand on it to keep it steady "it will help you relax." He watched as she drained the entire cup. She sat the cup down and rubbed her eyes. Soji helped her to lie down and pulled a blanket over her. "Your father can't hurt you anymore. I promise" he said as Amaterasu fell into a medicinal tea induced sleep his hand still tightly clasped in hers.

"Don't go" she whispered as she fell asleep. Soji smiled as he lay down beside her, content to watch her sleep and ready to comfort her should she have a nightmare.

o o o

Whew!! Chapter six is finished at last, and much quicker than chapter five (which I am utterly shocked about). I'm accepting suggestions for chapter seven. Also I am curious about what you think of Amaterasu. Is she a well-developed character? Is she too Mary Sue-ish? Should she kill me because of all the stuff I put her through in the story? And any other thoughts you have. Pineapple upside-down for everyone who reads this story and those who review get an extra piece with two cherries on it. Thank you all for blessing this humble little author with your readership. Hopefully chapter seven will be out soon. Also go check out Last Time of My Life which is a continuation of this story, but focuses more on Okita. I am absolutely addicted to that story. I'm so excited I'm going to be the big 21 on Sept. 12. Well, that's everything until chapter seven. See you there.


	7. Saule

Author's Note:

Well we have reached the last chapter of Suyuan. Very sad, I know, but the story had to end eventually. I tried my darnedest to write this story to the best of my ability and I hope all y'all enjoyed it. Thank you to all my loyal readers and to any future readers. I don't know if there will be any future Hellfire fanfics, but it might be possible.

Disclaimers:

I don't own Peacemaker Kurogane or any of its characters. I do, however, own Amaterasu, her father and mother, and any other characters I may come up with. Comments of the positive and negative variety are like sprinkles on a doughnut. Also a cumulative story review would be interesting like a shooting star.

A Message from Sakura 02:

"Once again (I mean, because I honestly haven't done this enough already) I would like to thank Hellfire13 for taking an interest in my story Last Time of My Life, and actually liking it enough to write it a prequel of sorts. She has been one of my more loyal readers to date, with which I am very flattered. She has helped me get through all my cases of writer's block and has always inspired me when I most need it. Her story Suyuan is a great read for anyone who likes historical fiction, Peacemaker Kurogane, or just enjoys reading something with a good plot. Although I am sad that this story is reaching its end, I'm glad that I was able to experience every bit of it. With dreams of sugarplum fairies, Sakura02."

o o o

When she woke up, Soji was gone. She realized that he couldn't spend all his time with her. Despite the fact that she couldn't entirely remember what had happened the previous night, she did recall Soji telling her that her father would never be able to hurt her again. She was free of him at last. She stood up and went outside where she was mobbed by her cats. She sat down and let the cats pile onto her lap and she began to stroke each cat as she stared out into the snow.

"You can come out, Tetsu" she said knowingly as Tetsu poked his head around the corner.

"Soji asked me to check on you" he said sheepishly, wondering how she could tell someone was secretly watching her.

"You can tell Soji I'm fine" she said as he ran off to deliver the message. She waited a few minutes before getting up and following him. She was just about to round the corner of the building when she heard the hushed voices of Yamazaki and Soji.

"Why won't you tell her the truth?" Yamazaki demanded.

"What would I say to her? The weather's nice…oh and by the way I killed your father. You don't think there's the slightest possibility she freak and overreact or something" Soji responded.

Amaterasu slowly backed away, her heart pounding in her chest, and retreated to the safety of her room. A part of her was grateful to Soji for caring about her enough to kill her father, but another part of her was mad at herself for being too weak to do it herself. Despite the intense hatred she felt for her father, she still loved him. And she grew to hate herself for feeling the love at all. She both loved and hated her father, which in turn bred self-hatred.

She opened the trunk with her crystals and searched through the pouch until she pulled out a pale blue bag and extracted a small stone of the same color from the bag. With the stone's help, she buried her feelings deep inside herself which left a cold feeling in her soul. Like she had frozen a piece of herself. She went back outside and sat down and stared out at the snow.

For hours she sat and stared at the snow. Thoughts ran through her head in no rational order or pattern. She was startled from her reverie by Soji laying a blanket over her shoulders.

"Come inside. You'll catch your death out here" he said as he led Amaterasu back inside and slid the door shut behind him. She sat down on the floor by the fire pit and watched as Soji put more logs on the dying fire.

Amaterasu stared into the flames and didn't even hear Soji leave. She held her hands out to warm them and winces as a dull ache emanates from the scar on her hand. Looking at the scar, she now realized what this feeling inside of her was. It was like a part of her had died and a cold, empty void was left in its place.

o o o

Time passed, the snow melted, and the spring brought new life to the land. It also brought the smile back to Amaterasu's face. To Soji she had returned to being the same Amaterasu that he remembered before her mother died. She was much happier and spent a lot more time outdoors playing with her cats. She seemed to be slowly forgetting all of the terrible memories of her father, but sometimes Soji noticed this unusual look on her face which he could never exactly put a specific emotion to.

"You've been staring at me for the past ten minutes" Amaterasu said as Soji bent down and picked up one of the cats and sat down beside Amaterasu, who was also holding a cat in her lap "what could you possibly be thinking about."

"Just thinking about how happy you've been lately" he responded, stroking the cat's head as it purred its content.

"I dreamt about my mother last night" she said staring at the cherry blossoms on the trees. "I can't remember much except that it was raining and we were both very happy. I just got this feeling that everything is going to be alright now." She nudged the cat off of her lap before standing up "I'm going for a walk by the river, you're welcome to join me."

"No thanks, I'm going to enjoy the scenery" he said as she walked around the corner of the building, the two remaining cats trailing close behind her. As her footsteps faded into the distance, Soji coughed a 

couple times. Thinking it was the start of a harmless cold, he didn't see the faint traces of blood dotting the cat's fur.

SSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Dun Dun Dun. Cliffhanger ending, at least until you read Last Time of My Life. Well that is the end of Suyuan. I hope to the celestial heavens that you enjoy the story in its entirety. I do suck at writing endings so it is fine by me if this isn't up to par with the other chapters. Just don't be too mean in the reviews, I might cry. You may or may not see any future projects as college and life are very time consuming. As always, I crave your lovely reviews. Hot chocolate and oatmeal raisin cookies for everyone, I also have chocolate soymilk if anyone would like that. Thanks to all my loyal readers/reviews as well as everyone who every read any part of this story.

Sayonara,

Hellfire!!


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